Our world is full of families that all look very different. Some spouses are one and done. Other families are determined to fill up an entire minivan. Then you have some couples who think they are done and God surprises them with another blessing – through pregnancy or even adoption. No matter the family size, they are all valued in the eyes of our Creator. Asking the question, “Does God want me to have another baby?” is something that every couple finds themselves facing at some point in marriage.
Things To Consider
When thinking about trying for another child, many families have to explore statements like:
- Does our family feels complete?
- Finances, home size, wrong timing – We have so many reasons to not have another child.
- We can serve Jesus better if it’s just us.
- I cannot physically carry another baby safely.
However, it must be asked if these are legitimate or moral reasons to put a halt on your family growth.
No matter how many children we settle on having, God is still the One who is Sovereign over all life. As we seek to honor Him in our growing families, may we ultimately submit to being an example of Christ to however many children He decides to bless us with.
How do I know that God wants me to have another baby?
All throughout Scripture you can see the evidence of the Father’s heart when it comes to families.
- God created the family when He made Adam and Eve. He even exhorted Adam and Eve to have lots of babies – enough to eventually fill the earth. Families and children have great value in the heart of God. (Genesis 1:28)
- God’s heart for kiddos can clearly be seen is Jesus’ interactions with children. He never pushes children away, but draws them to Himself. (Mark 10:13-16)
- Scripture calls children a heritage and blessing from the Lord. He compares a full home of children to a warrior with many arrows – sharp and ready to fight whatever comes their way. (Psalm 127:2-5)
- God’s Word also calls children the pride of their parents and grandchildren a crown to the old. (Proverbs 17:6)
For us, we found comfort in knowing that God had already chosen our family size. He would bless us with a baby when we were ready, whether we knew it or not. We needed to let go of our plans and live for HIS.
His Word
God clearly speaks to us through His Word. We must first look at what has been spoken in Scripture when asking if God wants us to have another baby. All of these stories from Scripture make it clear that God loves children and wants our homes to be full of them. Building godly families is one way in which God builds His Kingdom and makes His name known.
Conviction
The exhortation to have children and fill the earth is Genesis is pretty clear. However, it is not a command, but an exhortation. There are husbands and wives all over the world that are serving God and have chosen not to have children. These couples may feel that because they are childless they can devote more time to ministry. If this is their conviction before the Lord, then it is not our place to tell them otherwise.
Infertility
However, there are other families that desire to have children, but cannot get pregnant. Sweet friend, infertility is not a sign of displeasure from God. God desires for us to draw close in these times. Be hopeful in the waiting, but trust that He remains good no matter the outcome.
Praying for Another Child
Here are some things to pray for as you seek out the Lord about growing your family.
- Praise Him – Praise Him for His sovereignty over all life. Acknowledge that He is the One who knits every baby together in the womb, in accordance with His plan. His story is always better.
- Thank Him – Thank God for the children that you already have. If you are childless, thank Him for His promises of love and nearness in waiting.
- Trust Him – Acknowledging that we are not in control is hard. Surrender to trusting God’s timing for your family. Give every unknown and fear to Him.
- Ask Him – Ask Him to grow your family and to one day call your children to Himself. Ask Him for a safe, healthy pregnancy.
- Cry Out to Him – If you are in a season of waiting, lay your hurts at His feet. He is near and cares for you.
Prayer
Father,
We know that each child is a blessing from You. We pray for more blessings. Help us to trust your timing. If it takes us a long time to have another child, help us run to you in the waiting. If and when you create life in my womb, we pray for a healthy pregnancy. We pray that every child you give us would come to know You at a young age. Lord, may they live a long, fulfilled life serving you.
In Jesus Name, Amen.
Talking to your Spouse about Having Another Child
Praying for another child is a great way to connect with your spouse. However, sometimes husbands and wives may be on different pages when it comes to growing their families. Husbands may feel the pressure of finances and providing for another life. Wives may feel overwhelmed when thinking about the stresses that each pregnancy puts on their body. Whatever the case, there are many questions to think through to ensure that both spouses are united in growing the family.
Questions to Think and Talk Through
1. What are your reasons for waiting to have another child?
Scripture says to do nothing out of selfish ambition. Only God knows the true intentions of our hearts. Ask Him to reveal if your intentions for waiting are selfish or are they wise. Are you waiting because you truly do not have means to provide? Do you simply need to trust Him to provide for your needs in unexpected ways? These are things that only you and your spouse can personally seek the Lord on.
Are there legitimate physical reasons to wait?
Have you been diagnosed in the past with hyperemesis gravidarum? Have your children been IUGR? Could another pregnancy be fatal? These are all legitimate reasons to pray through waiting when considering growing your family through pregnancy.
If you decide to wait, what methods of contraception do you believe are morally right?
Barrier methods, natural family planning, or birth control pills. Many people have strong convictions about the right and wrong method of birth control. This is something that you and your spouse need to seek the Lord’s heart on.
Bible Verses to Pray for another child
We use the WEB translation of the Bible, but feel free to use your favorite version!
1. Psalm 127:3-5
“Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one’s youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their opponents in court.”
2. Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, And don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, And he will make your paths straight.”
Wrapping Things Up..
Sweet sister, I am praying for you. Seeking out if God wants your family to have another baby is not easy. It is ultimately something that has to be sought out individually and with your spouse. It is clearly seen in Scripture that God loves families and has a strong heart for children.
Ultimately, we can rest in knowing that no matter how much family planning we do, He is still the one in control. Even when we try and feel in control, He is sovereign over all life. Every child is knit together by the one who made all things. Praise God that He is in charge of our family planning, not us. We can rest in Him.
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